In honour of today’s chapter of the 30-Day Writing Challenge, I’m here to share with you a post by Jen from Dating Chaps on Apps. Her blog launches into the struggles of dating as a divorcee in the world of Tinder and OKCupid in a way that’s comedic and absolutely endearing.
In her latest post, Jen discusses the emotional struggles of getting back on her feet and facing some speedbumps along the way. Be sure to check out her site for more of her adventures!
Wow…so talk about deflated. After clowning around with that loser, I felt totally dejected and pessimistic. Is this what I had to look forward to? I just left my husband for lying to me and being a creep and now I’m out in the dating world dealing with the same thing. I figured since that feeling of bitterness that I had become so familiar with started creeping back into my psyche, it might be a good idea to take a break. Took myself off that dating site for a few months. Had to regroup and pull myself back together.
I know some of you may be reading this thinking, “damn girl, relax, it was just one guy!” And you’re somewhat correct…yes it was my first dating experience and it sucked…boo hoo…pick yourself up and get back out there-right?! Well easier said then done. For those of you new to the dating world after divorce, I think you can empathize with my feelings. After being with one man for such a long time, you can’t help but feel insecure and unfamiliar when trying to get back into that world. I mean, I couldn’t help but wonder…would anyone ever find me attractive, would they think I was fun, would they look down on me as damaged goods?
So here is the pity party in me…I’m in my last year of the “dirty 30’s”, knockin on 40’s door, divorced with kids, financially getting back on my feet, and the list goes on and on! Believe me there are days I want to just climb into bed and never get up. It would be soooo easy to give up and give in to this tough, lonely battle. I know if you have walked in my shoes you know exactly what I am talking about. But there’s that little fire in me…the one that ignited when I decided to leave my husband, the one that is burning brighter each day I get out of bed, work out, put make up on, get dressed up, go out to bars with girlfriends, etc. I know I need to put myself back out there, you gotta be in it to win it-right?! How is it that as women we love and support our friends, children, and family with such unfailing intensity, but completely abandon ourselves when we need that fierce strength the most?